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All Metaphor

The problem is metaphoric;
I live inside lines
which only approximate
but do not satisfy.

I'm symbol and artifact
but lack the substance of reality;

I kiss sometimes imitating
how the book says I should.

I talk
imitating
my favorite
movie star.

The difficulty is
I can remember
deciding what kind of personality
I would have at 13;
something low maintenance
I thought;

I'm not naturally effusive;
rather shy
so I decided to be low-key
and mysterious
and attract attention like that.

My look is straight
from the comic book character
I most admired at 10.

Hasn't changed much.

I don't know really how to love
but feel most in love
when I think about it

when I think I have gotten a bargain
in the other person;
you know
getting away with something;

That person is better looking than
me-a bargain
has more friends than me
has more to offer than me;
so me with him
is a bargain.

I know I should feel more
in love and friendship

but I don't really.

So I send cards and gifts.

I know I should be a better parent
so I buy and just follow the books;
as long as I do what they say
no one can criticize me.

You see what I mean?
All Metaphor.

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