Quotes like Shadorma (slimming) Low fat cheese...

Slimming

Shadorma (slimming)

Low fat cheese
Tastes like rubber soles
For weight loss
I eat it
Abusing my true taste buds
And I am still fat

poem by Oskar Hansen
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Fat

Your butt is wide, well mine is too
Just watch your mouth or Ill sit on you
The word is out, better treat me right
cause Im the king of cellulite
Ham on, ham on, ham on whole wheat, all right
My zippers bust, my buckles break
Im too much man for you to take
The pavement cracks when I fall down
Ive got more chins than chinatown
Well, Ive never used a phone booth
And Ive never seen my toes
When Im goin to the movies
I take up seven rows
Because Im fat, Im fat, come on
(fat, fat, really really fat)
You know Im fat, Im fat, you know it
(fat, fat, really really fat)
You know Im fat, Im fat, come on you know
(fat, fat, really really fat)
Dontcha call me pudgy, portly or stout
Just now tell me once again whos fat
When I walk out to get my mail
It measures on the richter scale
Down at the beach Im a lucky man
Im the only one who gets a tan
If I have one more pie a la mode
Im gonna need my own zip code
When youre only having seconds
Im having twenty-thirds
When I go to get my shoes shined
I gotta take their word
Because Im fat, Im fat, sha mone
(fat, fat, really really fat)
You know Im fat, Im fat, you know it
(fat, fat, really really fat)
You know Im fat, Im fat, you know it you know
(fat, fat, really really fat)
And my shadow weighs forty-two pounds
Lemme tell you once again whos fat
If you see me comin your way
Better give me plenty space
If I tell you that Im hungry
Then wont you feed my face
Because Im fat, Im fat, come on
(fat, fat, really really fat)
You know Im fat, Im fat, you know it
(fat, fat, really really fat)
You know Im fat, Im fat, you know it, you know
(fat, fat, really really fat)
Woo woo woo, when I sit around the house

[...] Read more

song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Eat It

How come youre always such a fussy young man?
Dont want no captain crunch, dont want no raison bran
Well, dont you know that other kids are starving in japan
So eat it, just eat it
Dont want to argue, I dont want to debate
Dont want to hear about what kind of food you hate
You wont get no dessert till you clean off your plate
So eat it
Dont you tell me youre full
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Get yourself an egg and beat it
Have some more chicken, have some more pie
It doesnt matter if its boiled or fried
Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it
Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it, ooh
Your table manners are some cryin shame
Youre playin with your food, this aint some kind of game
Now, if you starve to death, youll just have yourself to blame
So eat it, just eat it
You better listen, better do what youre told
You havent even touched your tuna casserole
You better chow down or its gonna get cold
So eat it
I dont care if youre full
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Open up your mouth and feed it
Have some more yogurt, have some more spam
It doesnt matter it its fresh or tanned
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Dont you make me repeate it
Have a banana, have a whole bunch
It doesnt matter what you had for lunch
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
If its gettin cold, reheat it
Have a big dinner, have a light snack
If you dont like it, you cant send it back
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Get yourself an egg and beat it (oh lord)
Have some more chicken, have some more pie
It doesnt matter if its boiled or fried
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Dont you make me repeat it (oh no)
Have a banana, have a whole bunch
It doesnt matter what you had for lunch
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Romeo Delight

I told her, never in hell, no special reason.
Must a lied cause I aint leavin.
Were in for a very long night.
Heard a vicious rumor from your mamas tongue:
You a desprate woman, need a man with a gun.
High crime zone in the city of lights.
Baby, please!
Cant take it anymore.
Baby, please!
Cant take it anymore.
Im takin whiskey to the party tonight,
And Im lookin for somebody to squeeze.
I aint lookin for somebody to fight.
Baby, dont get uptight.
Baby, please!
Wanna see my i.d.? try to clip my wings!
Dont have to show you proof of anything.
I know the law friend.
At the leventh hour. Im goin back outside.
Give it a try.
Im your last loose end.
Baby, please!
Cant take it anymore.
Baby, please!
Cant take it anymore.
Im takin whiskey to the party tonight
And Im lookin for somebody to squeeze.
I aint lookin for somebody to fight.
Baby, dont get uptight.
Baby, please!
I feel my heart beat,
Feel my heart beat,
Feel my heart beat,
Oh yeah.
Baby, please!
Cant take it anymore.
Baby, please!
Cant take it anymore.
Im takin whiskey to the party tonight,
And Im lookin for somebody to squeeze.
I aint lookin for somebody to fight.
Baby, dont get uptight.
Baby, please!
Loss of control
Mayday!
I checked it out. I think you ought to know.
Im only wastin time. I think Id better go.
You way too civilized. oh,
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!

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song performed by Van Halen
Added by Lucian Velea
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Fat Lenny

Fat lennys gonna walk right into myself
Fat lennys gonna see myself (reflect it back on myself)
Fat lennys gonna lick the shellack off the window sill
And I say fat lennys gonna lick my head off
Stop by my friend fat lenny, I like him a lot (tell him about my buddy)
Hes fat lenny - what
Fat lennys gonna lick the shellack off the window sill
And I said now fat lennys gonna jump up and down (run back down the hill)
And I said now fat lenny knows what he is (to be fat lenny) cause he is fat lenny (hes my buddy)
Hes fat lenny (I know what he is to be fat lenny) cause hes my friend fat lenny
I like fat lenny, I like cause hes my friend fat lenny - fat lenny
What - you know - hes fat lenny - you know
You know hes fat lenny
Fat lennys gonna lick my brain today
Fat lenny doesnt like me anyway
Fat lenny said (my friend) today
Fat lenny
Fat lenny, fat lenny,
Fat lenny, fat lenny, fat fat fat lenny
Fat lenny, fat lenny
Fat lenny, fat lenny, fat fat fat lenny

song performed by Ween
Added by Lucian Velea
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Loss Of Control

Mayday!
I checked it out. I think you ought to know.
Im only wastin time. I think Id better go.
You way too civilized. oh,
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Baby, I checked it out. I think you ought to know.
Im only wastin time. I think Id better go.
You way too civilized. oh,
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!
Baby, I checked it out. I think you ought to know.
Im only wastin time. I think Id better go.
You way too civilized. oh,
Loss of control, loss of control, loss of control!

song performed by Van Halen
Added by Lucian Velea
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Rubber Ring

A sad fact widely known
The most impassionate song
To a lonely soul
Is so easily outgrown
But dont forget the songs
That made you smile
And the songs that made you cry
When you lay in awe
On the bedroom floor
And said : oh, oh, smother me mother...
No ...
Rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring
La ...
The passing of time
And all of its crimes
Is making me sad again
The passing of time
And all of its sickening crimes
Is making me sad again
But dont forget the songs
That made you cry
And the songs that saved your life
Yes, youre older now
And youre a clever swine
But they were the only ones who ever stood by you
The passing of time leaves empty lives
Waiting to be filled (the passing ...)
The passing of time
Leaves empty lives
Waiting to be filled
Im here with the cause
Im holding the torch
In the corner of your room
Can you hear me ?
And when youre dancing and laughing
And finally living
Hear my voice in your head
And think of me kindly
No ...
Rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring
La ...
No ...
Rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring
Do you
Love me like you used to ?
Oh ...
Rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring
La ...
Youre clever
Everybodys clever nowadays

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song performed by Smiths
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Taste So Good

[intro]
Please play at low volume
Preferably, while having sex
Can I taste you, can I taste you
(yes, you can)
Can I taste your body, girl
(of course you can)
Can I taste you, can I taste you
I just cant wait to
Can I taste you, can I taste you
(of course you can)
Can I taste your body, girl
(yes, you can)
Can I taste you, can I taste you
(oh, dont stop, until I tell you to)
Oh, baby whatcha doing
Got me feining like this
I wanna go to your valley
I wanna taste your lips, oh yeah
Never understood it
All my homies say dont do it
But baby when I tried it
Girl I couldnt help but like it
You taste so good
Baby you taste so good
You know you do girl
You taste so good
Baby do you like it when I taste your love, yeah
You taste so good
Baby, you taste so good
You know that it tastes so good
You taste so good
So good to me, my baby
So good to me, yeah
Sweeter than candy
Making my tongue so happy, oh
Loving down your backside
Girl, wont you take me on a thigh ride
Well go home
We;ll go around when we bounce
Youre giving me so much
Just swing and make you bounce
Your love is so delicious
Baby, I can tell by the smile on your face
Ya dont mind
If I have another taste
You taste so good
Baby, you taste so good
You taste so good
I cant get over this taste I found

[...] Read more

song performed by Next
Added by Lucian Velea
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Giving Of The Time That You've Got

When you get to pick and eat it,
It tastes so good.
Even giving it a minute,
It tastes so good.
Licking lips and fingertips,
It tastes so good.
With a taste only you,
Believed it would.

And...
Giving it the time that you've got.
Want and needed.
Giving it the time that you've got.
Want and needed.
You're giving it the time you've got.
Want AND needed...
You're giving it the time you've got.

When you get to pick and eat it,
It tastes so good.
Even giving it a minute,
It tastes so good.
Licking lips and fingertips,
It tastes so good.
With a taste only you,
Believed it would.

And-you-are...
Giving it the time that you've got.
Want and needed.
Giving it the time that you've got.
Want and needed.
Giving it the time that you've got.
Want and needed.
Giving it the time that you've got.

When you get to pick and eat it,
It tastes so good.
With a giving of the time that you've got.
Want and needed.
Giving of the time that you've got.

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Tastes So Good

Please play at low volume
Preferably while havin sex
can i taste you can i taste you
(yes you can)
Can i taste your body girl
(of course you can)
Can i taste you can i taste you
I just cant wait to
Can i taste you can i taste you
( of course you can)
Can i taste your body Girl
(yes you can)
can i taste you can i taste you
( oh dont stop until i tell you to)
Oh baby whatcha doin
got me feining like this
I wanna go to your valley
I wanna taste your lips oh yeah
Never understood it
All my homies say dont do it
But baby when i tried it
Girl i couldnt help but like it
You taste so good
baby you tase so good
you know you do girl
you taste so good
Baby do you like it when i taste your love yeah
you taste so good
Baby you taste so good
you know that it tastes so good
you taste so good
so good to me my baby
so good to me yeah
Sweeter than candy
makin my tongue so happy oh
Lovin down your backside
Girl wont you take me on a thigh ride
we'll go home
we'll go areound when we bounce
your givin me so much
just swing and make you bounce
your love is so delicious
baby i can tell by the smile on your face
ya dont mind
if i have another taste
You taste so good
baby you taste so good
you taste so good
I cant get over this taste i found
when i go downtown down

[...] Read more

song performed by Next
Added by Lucian Velea
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Diamonds On The Soles Of Her Shoes

(a-wa) o kodwa u zo-nge li-sa namhlange
(a-wa a-wa) si-bona kwenze ka kanjani
(a-wa a-wa) amanto mbazane ayeza
Shes a rich girl
She dont try to hide it
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes
Hes a poor boy
Empty as a pocket
Empty as a pocket with nothing to lose
Sing ta na na
Ta na na na
She got diamonds on the soles of her shoes
She got diamonds on the soles of her shoes
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes
People say shes crazy
She got diamonds on the soles of her shoes
Well thats one way to lose these
Walking blues
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes
She was physically forgotten
Then she slipped into my pocket
With my car keys
She said youve taken me for granted
Because I please you
Wearing these diamonds
And I could say oo oo oo
As if everybody knows
What Im talking about
As if everybody would know
Exactly what I was talking about
Talking about diamonds on the soles of her shoes
She makes the sign of a teaspoon
He makes the sign of a wave
The poor boy changes clothes
And puts on after-shave
To compensate for his ordinary shoes
And she said honey take me dancing
But they ended up by sleeping
In a doorway
By the bodegas and the lights on
Upper broadway
Wearing diamonds on the soles of their shoes
And I could say oo oo oo
As if everybody here would know
What I was talking about
I mean everybody here would know exactly
What I was talking about
Talking about diamonds
People say Im crazy

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song performed by Paul Simon
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Cheese Balls

Cheese balls!

Sniff them as you lick them,
Cheese balls.
Delicious when you eat them,
Cheese balls.
Salty and their tart.
A snack that's hard to stop!

Cheddar up.

Cheese balls.
Sniff them as you lick them.
Cheese balls.
Delicious when you eat them.
Cheese balls.
Salty and they're tart,
And a snack that's hard to top.

Cheddar up.

Get a big bag and begin to stuff your gutt.

Those, those, those...
Cheese balls.
The cheddar makes them better.
Cheese balls.
They're better when they're cheddar.
Forget about the fedder...
And that gouda gotta go!
You've got to get them cheddar.
It's that cheddar taste that grows.

Cheddar up, cheddar up, cheddar up!
Those cheese balls...
Delicious when you eat them.
Cheese balls.
Sniff them as you lick them.
Cheese balls.
And a snack that's hard to stop!
Salty and they're tart...
Forget about the fedder.
And that gouda gotta go!
Cheese balls!

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Added by Poetry Lover
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Cheese Cake

I met a babe in a backseat drive-in
Back in the saddle shed sit
Pulled on the reins just to keep me risin
She loved to chomp at the bit
Daddy do it, oh, just do it
Daddy do it, please let me see
Do it, please just do it daddy
Do it, do it, drivin me crazy
She walks away with her eyes
Down on her bootlace
She lives to give it away
She dont believe in the right or the wrong case
Shes always liable to say
Daddy do it, oh, just do it
Daddy do it, please let me see
Do it, please just do it daddy
Do it, do it, drivin me crazy
(cheese cake), looser than her sister
(cheese cake), her sugar gets me high
She knows I cant resist her (cheese cake)
Got my fingers in her pie (cheese cake)
(cheese cake), sneakin out the back door
(cheese cake), rollin down the lawn
Everybody kissed her (cheese cake)
At the crack of dawn (cheese cake)
Daddy do it, oh, just do it
Daddy do it, please let me see
Daddy do it, please just do it daddy
Do it, do it, do it, drivin me crazy
(cheese cake), looser than her sister
(cheese cake), her sugar gets me high
She knows I cant resist her (cheese cake)
Got my fingers in her pie (cheese cake)
Repeat (cheese cake)

song performed by Aerosmith
Added by Lucian Velea
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Where The Rubber Meets The Road

Somewhere some girl is crazy.
And some boys half out of his head.
Somewhere somebodys fearless.
And someone wont wind up dead.
Somewhere two hearts are pounding.
And they dont care whats correct.
Somewhere somebodys fallin in love.
Without a background check...
Son Im mr p.c.
Belive you me.
Im the ultimate king of correct.
And if you wanna make it.
You gotta make her take it.
As a sign a your deep respect.
If youre gonna do it.
You gotta see through it.
To the hevenly trust that is...
Then you can call her a slut.
And you can call her a slave.
If you remember to call her ms...
Where the rubber meets the road.
Welcome to protection mode.
Used to be sex was a fine hello.
Where the rubber meets the road.
Ya say girl, youre a beauty.
But Im no beast.
I got a little contract right here...
See, you can slam on the brakes.
Anytime you got the stick.
Even if were in 4th gear.
Cop in the front seat.
Lawyer in the back seat.
Gettin it on videotape.
Got a shrink in the bed, lord.
Sittin on the headboard.
Swearin that we both got raped.
Now the rubber meets the road.
Where the rubber meets the road.
Boy meets girl then watch it explode.
Yes means no means yes means no.
Where the rubber meets the road!
Somewhere some girl is crazy.
And some boys half out of his head.
Somewhere somebodys fearless.
And someone wont wind up dead.
Somewhere two hearts are pounding.
And they dont care whats correct.
Somewhere somebodys fallin in love.
Without a background check...
Somewhere somebodys fallin in love.

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song performed by Meat Loaf
Added by Lucian Velea
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l Losses Are Sometime Good...

Loss, most of the time bad. On occasion, great!

SOME TIME A LOSS CAN BE GOOD!

Can loss sometime be happy. You bet! Ask some
divorced couples.

The other guy had a loss and I won!

My ex had a loss, of most of our assets. Yes,
you guessed it, I got 'em!

Insurance companies, now there's some, that
many take great delight,
when they suffer a loss.

When the tax man does an audit, if they have
a loss, we have a win! (best kind of loss)

The person who brings suite against you,
suffers a loss. (Ain't that sweet?)

A hostile mother-in-law, suffers a loss,
when her daughter gets divorced.

When one experiences a weight loss.
Now that's something that would make
millions of people happy!

When the owner of your building, is deemed
to be, 'rent controlled, ' it brings a loss
to the greedy titleholder. (break out the champagne)

When the neighbor you hadn't spoken to for years,
has a loss, of the keys, to her car.

When the kid, who keeps running over your lawn,
with his bike, has a loss, of the two wheel monster.

When you child, who you love, but drives you nuts
with their loud music, has a broken stereo,
and a loss of music. (They're unhappy. You're ecstatic.)

When one has a loss of sleep, because their spouse
was amorous all night. (Ahhhh, the good old days.)

When your in-laws, prepare to come to your house,
for the first time, and have a loss of directions.

When your spouse, who cremates every barbecue

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poem by Joe Fazio
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Not All Losses Are Bad