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Grains Of Solace

If only my shyness was broken.
And sent with a wrath to it's grave.
If only the words that I've spoken.
Were welcomed with more than false praise.

If only the blood in my veins.
Wasn't chilling with feelings of doubt.
If only the peace in my brain.
Was less a disaster of drought.

If only the hope in my heart.
Was sustained and then finally felt.
If only the gods that you've offered.
Hadn't mocked as I faithfully knelt.

The laughter that booms at my back.
Stirring up the wildfire inside.
Through years of consistent damage.
I've lost every dropp of past pride.

And that pride, gravely miniscule at best.
Peace and hope proudly followed it too.
Now the emptiness that rips at my chest.
Inspires these lines I've imbued.

The protection of my weakest organ.
Fell beyond that which I understand.
While these imaginary grains of solace.
Collapse out of my broken hands.

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