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Weighing Heavily On Your Mind

You know the days when you feel that your life is slipping through your fingers, and there is nothing you can do. It is one of those days today. It is weighing on my mind whether to stay or go. You feel like giving up the job, your hobbies, the lot, just turn your back and start a new somewhere else.

The problem is, what about your friends, what will they think? They’d probably want the best for you, but they would not want you to go. However sometimes its for the best, to go away and start a new life somewhere. Just say goodbyes and then just go. Disappear to who knows where, try not to shed a tear too much, nor regret what you are about to do. Just put the old life away on a shelf, try and tell yourself it didn’t exist at all.

Oh, I wish it was that easy. Memories of places and faces of friends would still be there at the back of my mind. They don’t disappear that easily I have found. I think to myself, I’ve done this before, it will only be the closing of just another door, another chapter on my life. Maybe sometime in the future another door will open, and behind it I will find some old friends. Who knows what the score will be. As for right now a decision has to be made. Still I am pondering what I am going to do. I might just leave that decision for a day or two.

Who knows someone of something might make me change my mind. But whatever I decide there is one thing I know. I think whatever I decide it will be a bit of a struggle inside.

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